Chapter 9: Erica

“Mommy! Daddy!” I hear Tyler yell out as he bursts through the door at 6 in the morning, only to jump up onto the purple comforter of a bed between Carter and I to jump up and down. Wearing his yellow duck onesie that had orange feet, he bent over into a cat-like position, facing Carter and I, only to howl like a wolf towards a full moon. Afterwards, he stood up and jumped off the bed, only to start imitating a chicken dancing in a circle with his hands in his armpits while making the sound of a duck at the same time. However, he stopped dancing like a chicken, only to start singing Duran Duran’s song Hungry Like The Wolf: “I’m on the hunt, I’m after you. Mouth is alive with juices like wine. And I’m hungry like the wolf”.

Staring rather mindlessly at Carter, I try not to get lost in those dark brown eyes of his, but I hear him mutter at me from underneath the purple comforter, “He gets it from you”. Lying down, only to stare at the popcorn ceiling above me, I hear Carter tell Tyler as he gets out of bed and walks towards him, “Come on, you don’t want to be late for school”, getting him out of the room, before leaving himself and heading down to the kitchen. 

Okay, I’ll admit it - I know about the story that Guinevere gave to Carter. I came across it the other day and I’ve been keeping it a secret ever since then. I don’t understand why he wouldn’t tell me about it in the first place though. Is there something that Carter isn’t telling me? However, it was on that same day I ended up calling Charlotte, asking if we could meet up in a couple of days from then. Now, it’s the day of, and I have no clue what I’m going to tell her. In fact, I have no idea whether I should tell her about the story or not, because she might not know about it, and me exposing it to her would not be the wise thing for me to do - cause Guinevere would find out and would think that Carter did that, and then he would realize that I found it. So I can’t say anything, because it’ll lead straight back to me. 

…

Down in the kitchen, I see Carter wearing his burgundy housecoat with a cup of coffee in hand and reading the newspaper at the edge of the island. I stepped in wearing my dark brown hair curled behind my ear, featuring stud silver earrings, yet I’m wearing my dark grey blouse that tucks into my tight black skirt. “Where’s Tyler and Shawn?” I ask Carter as I grab myself a cup of coffee from the machine that was near Carter. “Getting changed,” Carter tells me after taking a small sip of coffee. “Anything new in the world?” I ask him, causing him to look away from the newspaper. “Nothing to worry about,” he tells me as he places the newspaper on the island in front of him. “I have to get changed and take the kids to school,” Carter tells me as he stands up and walks towards me, only to give me a quick peck on the cheek. “Okay,”  I tell Carter before I take another sip of coffee out of my “World’s Greatest Mom” cup that Carter had got for me for Mother’s Day the year before, only to place it on the island.

If Carter is keeping secrets from me, then I’ll keep secrets from him. But I know he’s not the only one that isn’t telling me the truth. On the same day I went to get new underwear for Carter, I ran into Eliana and Guinevere shopping. I still remember that day - a week after the party Carter was the most drunk. 

I was looking through the underwear selection at the nearest store, only to notice Eliana and Guinevere in the distance, walking out of changing stalls. Eliana had walked out wearing funky dress pants that had blue and white horizontal zig zags and a light yellow orange keyhole blouse that matched well with her dark caramel-like skin and long wavy brown hair. Guinevere was wearing a light pink keyhole blouse with dark black jeans that had a hole on the right knee, matching with her short aquamarine hair. “Is that Erica?” I remember overhearing Guinevere ask Eliana when they noticed me in the distance. “You need to tell her what Carter did to you,” I remember overhearing Eliana state to Guinevere. At the moment, I knew to step in and ask what was going on, because if Carter did something to Guinevere, I had every right to know. “Sorry, I overhead. Did something happen with Carter?” I remember stepping in and asking, revealing two changing rooms back to back behind them, with Guinevere stepping forward from the grey ottoman behind her. “Nothing happened - can’t you just accept that?” I remember her asking me with a rather stern voice, using those ocean blue eyes of her as a threat instead of inviting someone in. “Guinevere - did he do something to you?” I remember asking her, not going to stop until she told me what he did to her. I remember wanting to give Carter a piece of mind instead of new underwear as a birthday present, but I never found out what happened. “Nothing happened - just fucking accept that,” I remember her swearing at me in a stern voice, piercing those blue eyes towards me as if she tried to get me to move. I never like swearing, but when it’s acceptable, I challenge people. When I turned around, Eliana had left to go look at dresses that were hanging on a nearby rack off to my left. “Guinevere, do you want me to tell your mother that you swore at me?” I remember asking her as I placed my red leather bag on the ottoman, ready to face her if I needed to.  “Please don’t,” I still remember her shaky voice let out in a quiet whimper. “You know I don’t like it when people keep secrets from me,” I remember telling her as I silently approached her, staring at those eyes of hers. They were no longer the piercing ocean that you can drown in, but instead they were covered with grey clouds and a tsunami was slowly rolling in. Grabbing onto her left hand, I felt her white sparkly fingernails slowly digging into my own skin. 

Guinevere…

If there’s something going on you have to tell me…

Before I knew it, my right hand struck across Guinevere’s face in a heat of rage, sending it through my hand and onto her face as she fell to the ground, grasping onto her left cheek. “What the hell was that for?” I still remember her yelling out at me from the ground, causing Eliana to rush over to the scene. “Erica, what have you done?” I remember Eliana asking me in a rather rude tone of voice, only to make me realize the reality of what I had done and why I was there in the first place: not to assault Guinevere, but to grab new underwear for Carter. I remember looking back and forth, hoping that no one else would hear me, before I leaned down to Guinevere’s level, grabbed her chin with with my right hand, and after forcing her to look me in the eye, I told her and only her in a rather stern tone, “you tell anyone what happened here, I will hunt you down and finish the job myself,” before standing up and walking towards the underwear section as if nothing ever happened.

But something did happen. I threatened Guinevere. I’ve never thought about a plan of action ever since then, but we were able to bury the hatchet, until I met her former friend Grace. She told me the truth about Guinevere, and ever since then, I’ve kept this to myself. So I guess we’re all keeping secrets from one another. 

“Erica?” Carter asks me. I got so lost in the memory that I smashed my mug and the glass was now on the floor with small coffee stains collecting in a small pool.  “You smashed your mug,” he tells me before stepping over the mess and giving me a peck on the left cheek. The same damn cheek that I slapped Guinevere on. “I’m heading off now,” he tells me before heading to the front door with Tyler and Shawn wearing their matching backpacks. 

Leaving the mess of glass on the floor, I grabbed my bag that was on the dining table. After watching Tyler, Shawn, and Carter leave, I exit the front door, only to sit down on the front steps. 

Beside the front door is where there is a small patch of grass where a few roses used to be. I never found out who it was that took them, but Carter planted them with his bare hands - they were important to him, and even though he’s not worried so much about where they are, I know I want to know where the roses are. Whoever took them is on my list - along with Guinevere. 

I try to not act out, but when I do I can’t control it. I know Guinevere and I used to be friends, but when I found out the truth, I knew to never let her back into my life, especially Carter’s. I don’t want Guinevere dead, but I want her out of our lives and into Anthony’s, where I know she can spend the rest of her life with love that I know he can give her. Carter wouldn’t be able to. “You wanted to see me?” Charlotte asks as she walks towards me. “Yes,” I tell her as I stand up from the cobble-block entrance. “Can we walk?” I ask her as I fix my purse over my shoulder. “Of course,” Charlotte tells me. Charlotte is wearing a light pink shirt that flows down the front of her body, and is wearing dark jeans, but has her short dark brown hair pulled back, featuring those brown eyes of hers and red lips that I would get jealous of every once in a while. I guess that’s where Guinevere gets them from. “There was something you wanted to talk about?” Charlotte asks me as we walk past the patches of trees between my house and another that seemed like that random cabin in the woods when you get lost in the forest. “I was wondering what you were going to do for Guinevere’s birthday,” I finally admitted to her. I was never going to tell Charlotte that Guinevere and I are actually in a rivalry - that’s all in my head, and she’s sworn to never tell anyone about that day in the store. “I don’t know what to do. I mean, what do you give to an 18 year old woman who has depression?” Charlotte asked me before stopping and started crying on the spot. We were near the backend of the school, and I didn’t want Charlotte to be spotted, so I lightly grabbed her shoulders and we entered the forest behind the school. 

“Were you thinking of getting something for her?” Charlotte asks me, reminding me that I used to be good friends with Guinevere. However, for the past few months we weren’t on speaking terms - but now I had to get something for her. “Yeah I was,” I lied to her. I had to find Anthony and ask him if he could get something for her so I could pass it on to Charlotte. “Look, I got to go back now,” Charlotte tells me before darting off behind me with her hands covering her crying face. I guess that didn’t go as well as I thought it would, but now I needed to find Anthony. 

I knew that Anthony and Guinevere were dating, and that he would be able to get something for her. 

Okay yes, Guinevere is on my list of people who I despise. I don’t want her in my life anymore. Ever since Grace told me the truth, I’ve known to not say anything, especially to Carter. 

Hold on a moment…

I see Grace talking to Carter in the playground of the elementary side. I can’t hear what they’re saying, but I see Grace with her dirty blonde hair pulled back into a ponytail and has a yellow and black blouse on with light blue ripped jeans. When Grace walked off, I thought she was heading off to the high school side, but instead Guinevere was with her, and leading Guinevere towards Carter. I don’t understand…

Trying not to worry too much about that, I find a rather distraught Anthony sitting on a bench nearby, who was silently watching Guinevere and Carter walk off towards the school. Stepping towards him as he was watching the kids play on the mini apollo near the learning sanctuary and the back exit to the second soccer field nearest the high school, I finally realized the truth: he was crying. 

“Anthony?” I ask as I step towards him, seeing that wet face from the tears streaming down his pale face from his blue eyes. “Erica?” He asks me as he stands up, yet has a hard time standing up at first, tripping on his own two feet. “Is everything all right?” I asked him, gesturing my hand as comfort to sit. “No,” I hear him say with his voice breaking. It didn’t seem like it was going to stop anytime soon, so I sat down on the bench, and he sat beside me, burying his crying face in my lap, leaving me no choice but to silently run my hand through his golden locks and tell him, “everything’s going to be alright,” even though everything seemed like it wasn’t. 

“You don’t understand what happened,” Anthony started as he tried rebelling against me in words. “What happened?” I asked him, trying to make sure that my voice came out rather gentle instead of a rude tone and walked away from him. “Guinevere broke up with me,” he finally tells me before burying his head into my lap once more, letting the never-ending tears fall. Great - now I have no choice but to actually get something for her when that was the last thing I wanted to do. 

“Do you know why?” I asked out of curiosity, silently watching the door that Guinevere and Carter entered through, waiting for her to leave and go to the high school side - but I didn’t see it happen. “She fell for someone else,” Anthony tells me, confirming the emotions that I didn’t want to admit to myself. 

But I don’t understand...

Why would Grace lie to me?

Why would Grace tell me that Anthony and Guinevere were in their relationship for life?

Grace - you just got put on my list, and I’m coming for you...

But I don’t understand… 

I thought Grace told me that Guinevere was still dating Anthony…

So why is Guinevere with Carter? 

Is Carter keeping something from me that he’s not telling me? 

Is it the story?

Or is it something else that he’s keeping from me?