Chapter 18
I was recently added to the group chat with Chase and his friends. They all welcomed me, and I typed a simple Hi before heading out the door to hang out with Brianna and Natalie. I sent a quick message in the chat:
I’m on my way.
Then I walked to the nearest bus stop so I wouldn’t have to walk too far.
Eventually, I made it to Brianna’s house. I texted her:
I’m at the front door.
A minute later, she opened it with a bright, “Hey! You made it,” and pulled me into a hug. I stepped inside and shut the door behind me. Natalie and the other girl were already on the couch talking.
“Hey guys,” I said.
“Hey,” “Hi,” they replied as I walked over and leaned back into the cushions.
We all gathered around the couch and chair, catching up, laughing a little, until Natalie asked:
“How are things with you and Chase?”
I hesitated. “We’re okay.”
They exchanged a look — the kind that says no, you’re not — and Brianna asked gently:
“Are you sure? You can be honest with us. You know that.”
I didn’t want to talk about it. But I trusted them. And I was tired of pretending.
“No… we’re not okay. Or at least I’m not.”
They already knew part of the story, but I continued:
“We’re doing an open relationship now. You can date others but stay with your main partner. I’m doing it for him because he wanted it. And recently… we were out on a date, and I snooped on his phone. And… you were right. He doesn’t know that I know.”
Their faces went serious. Brianna shook her head.
“You’re serious? Oh man… I can’t believe this is happening to you. But you shouldn’t be afraid to ask him.”
“I did,” I said. “I texted him asking if there was anything he wanted to tell me. He said no. He promised he wasn’t hiding anything.”
“That makes sense,” she said. “People who don’t want to confess usually say that. And open relationships? They rarely work unless you get lucky. Lola, you need to put your needs first. Not his.”
“I know.”
Just then, my phone buzzed. Finn.
Everything okay with you and him?
I typed back:
Honestly? No… but I’m trying to be okay. Are you?
What’s going on? I’m okay. Just with him and the other two.
Fun… fun. Well, Chase and I are doing an open relationship. He wanted it. I didn’t. But I’m doing it for him.
I set my phone down and tried to distract myself. The girls and I played board games, listened to music, and tried to lighten the mood.
Saturday morning came. I was asleep until my phone blew up with notifications. I ignored them at first, then finally checked.
My friends were talking about prom — something I’d completely forgotten about with everything going on. Chase had sent a sweet message:
Good morning, Princess. Hope you slept well. I was thinking we could meet up later today.
His friends were chatting too, making plans.
I replied to my group chat:
Prom slipped my mind until you guys mentioned it. I’m excited to go. I’ll ask Chase to come with me, but I need to let the principal know first.
Then I texted Chase:
Hey love, I just woke up. Good morning to you too.
I put my phone down and went back to sleep. It was the weekend. I didn’t want to think about anything.
Later that day, Chase came over. It was just the two of us at my house. We were on the couch when we started making out. His hands slowly moved down my body, and I could tell he was getting turned on.
“Want to take this to your bedroom?” He whispered against my neck.
I pulled back slightly. “I’m not feeling it right now… maybe later?”
He paused, disappointed. “Oh. Okay. No worries. No pressure.”
Guilt hit me immediately. “I’m sorry… maybe next time.”
“It’s okay.”
Then — as if the day wasn’t already complicated — he brought up the girl he’d gotten involved in our relationship. The one I’d been trying to forget.
My stomach tightened. “Who’s the girl who said yes to this?”
“Evelyn,” he said casually. “She’s really nice and wants to meet you.”
My stomach dropped.
“Oh really? That’s great…” My voice sounded flat, unhappy. I forced myself to soften it. “She wants to meet me?”
“Yeah! You’ll like her.”
“I doubt it. I’m selective when it comes to making friends.”
He didn’t notice the shift in my tone. Or maybe he did and didn’t care.
While he was busy gaming on my TV, I texted Finn privately:
You knew about Evelyn, didn’t you?
He replied quickly, sounding guilty:
We didn’t know until he told us about her a few months back. We wanted to tell you, but we wanted Chase to do it. I’m guessing he did now, huh?
Well, he told me he got her involved in our open relationship. And now I have to go along with it. This is my fault for saying yes. Ugh. I hate myself even more.
Oh… Lola… don’t say that. I feel bad now for not saying anything sooner.
You should’ve. But whatever.
Lola, I’m sorry. I really am. Same with Nicholas and Jacob.
I put my phone away and told Chase:
“I’m going to go outside for a moment.”
He looked over. “You sure you’re okay?”
“I’m fine. I’ll be out there if you need me.”
I stepped outside, needing air, needing space, needing anything that wasn’t this.
Finally, the day ended. Chase kissed my cheek.
“I love you. Text you when I get home.”
“Okay. Be safe.”
He walked out and shut the door behind him.
Today went from good to worse. I felt like an idiot for not knowing better. But I kept telling myself the same thing:
I’ll do whatever it takes for our relationship to last.
I’ll work on communication.
I’ll make it work.
Even if it breaks me.