Teaching me wrong
My hunter would keep close to me as he saw I was often sad and as a distraction he would teach me things . He was a hunter and did not know all the witch laws and customs but he knew enough to kill them so what he knew he began to teach me as he tried to not make out lessons long as it was extremely cold outside and he didn't want me to become sick as he would make sure I was warm as possible.
He would often tell me to come to him when I was upset as he utilized my emotions to reach me things he knew from his many decades of fighting my kind. He would bring me into the rain and tell me to see the action as I practiced over and over when I was angry or upset with making ice or controlling fire . He basically was teaching me how to use things he was on the defending side of a fight.
For a hunter he was very informative about what abilities my kind was capable of and how he would counter it as he trained me what worked on hunters and what spell and magick hurt hunters the most as he told me that some magick don't work on hunters and I would have to rely on my speed and strength in a fight to defeat them . We spent many hours him teaching me how to conjure a spell and then him deflecting it so I could see the aftermath of the spell casted at him.
He called this battle magick as he saw this during many wars with my kind as he would help me understand how much power I held and I was still small. When we weren't fighting and leaning he thought me how to settle my thoughts and home my skills of listening as I was blindfolded to listen to noises and point the direction to know I could hear danger coming . He was my hunter and he was teaching me how to survive what I am.
At the time I didn't understand why he was teaching me this as I held his sword and he hadn't mentioned it since that day as he would often chase me and set up traps to teach me what to look for and how hunters set traps to hurt my kind. This was how I used to unwind from my life as I knew it because let's face it . It was basically a total mess.
After my dad and her divorced it didn't take her long to start dating and not did my mother pick some real winners in her choices of men. My mother was always surrounded by men and it always puzzled me how she maintained this vibe as she was like a siren calling men to their own destruction.
The first time I met Larry he was normal and yet he seem like he was not all right in his head. Larry was a resemblance of my biological father as they were both brown of hair and had a belly full of beer and bad choices. Larry lived in a trailer park with his wife and three sons whom all shared a room. I remember the trailer because many times I visited it and fell asleep in the race car bed the youngest boy had.
My mother wasn't a very nice person and she was rather mean to men but they flocked to her like a moth to the flame. Larry was a married man in an unhappy marriage. I remember his wife's details but not her name as she was gone the week after we were introduced to Larry. His wife was a tall woman no bigger then a size three in dress size and long black hair she wore past her back . She had legs for miles and she was very much always on edge as she didn't talk to my mother much as I could understand why she didn't as I would not entertain a women their to replace her .
When Larry's wife left he was tragic. He kept on but the three boys would survive off of bread and mustard sandwiches . You could say he wasn't much hope as a father and he had no problem leaving his kids to their own survival. My mom and Larry was much alike. When my mom would date men kids were not part of the relationship as she dropped my sisters as well as Larry's three boys off at our house as me and my sisters were forced to watch three extra mouths to feed while my mother persued her relationship with Larry.
To me it was a way to keep us occupied and distracted from her not wanting to be a responsible parent. At age ten I was now a babysitter and a mother . I was responsible for taking care of thee boys who were not mine to take care of and feed them and watch them. We were often left alone with boys that were sons of my mother's current boyfriends as she left to be in a relationship and it happened so often we all slept in the same beds and used to being left alone for weeks with what ever man she was dating children at the time.
She left us so long that my sister mia had to steal our dads checkbook that was left in the draw when he went to prison and write checks to pizza places and have them delivered to the house since none of us was old enough to drive when we needed food. My mother basically left us to be raised ferral and we did what we had to . When the checks started to bounce and the courts hot involved for writing bad checks my mother finally came home to deal with her unruly unsupervised children getting her in trouble.
When my dad found out the conditions we were left to survive he dropped the charges that was pending and agreed to pay the amount when he got out of prison. My mom only came home because we were making her look like she wasn't doing her job as a parent. We had to eat and that was what we had to do. We are pizza every day for a summer and I grew sick of pizza that would impact my preferences that I couldn't eat more than two slices now without feeling vomit up in my mouth and I would have to force myself to eat it even when I knew it was a memory when my mother was neglectful of me.
When I wasn't home eating pizza I was running the streets or in the woods training. I would be allowed to run anywhere I felt and stay until the nights fall and walk home alone . We were basically savages running the streets all hours of the day and my mother was too wrapped up with her relationships and her social life that she didn't care what we were doing as long as we didn't get her in trouble.
Around this time I began to write and won a poetry contest and was supposed to be recognized for my poetry but my mother would place all my papers in her draw where she never allowed me to be part of anything that I enjoyed doing. This was also the time where she was fussing at utility companies over things that she caused. Where she was always pushing back things to suit the reason why she couldn't pay her bills. I watched my mother as she was too wrapped up to help me with homework .
One particular evening she was in the phone ignoring me and I needed her to write an excuse for me since I left my book at school and I was already failing because I was falling asleep a lot and couldn't pay attention in class. I had no one at home to help explain things to me and when I went to school the girls would make fun of me and I just wanted to disappear.
I had wrote out a note for an excuse why I didn't have my assignment because I left my books at school by accident she got mad at me and told me to sign her name for it. My mother was so lazy she taught me how to forge her name so I could sign my own permission slips for schools. She didn't want to be bothered about anything at all. I had been signing her name for everything since we came home because she couldn't be around to sign things for me. I was filling out my own school enrollment forms and signing my own field trip forms and sick excuses as there were many of them since my mom would get sick and I would stay home to help her get better or my sisters would lose their temper and beat me up so bad I had bruises all over me and I was made to stay home to heal so the bruises wouldn't show as the councilor kept a close eye on me.
Those were all excuse notes that was written for one reason or another. The one time where I had hot grease poured on my while my mom and sister got into a fight and I had to stay home with burns on me as my skin blistered and busted and oozed because she couldn't be bothered to take me to the hospital to be treated . That time I stayed home two weeks as I healed from a bad burn.
My mother was on the verge of truency and hiding me every time I got hurt. This particular time I signed the excuse for my mom because like normal she was too busy to be bothered with me. When the principal called me to the office I told him I was given permission to sign papers for myself by my mother and my mother was called as she told him I was allowed to sign it as they told her I was being taught wrong. And this would be put on my permanent record for forgery is against the law even with my mother's permission.
Then the principal proceeded to tell me I was suspended .I had three days to think about what I did as I explained why I did it and they made it about me messing up where I was punished for my mother giving me permission to sign her name. This was basically how I was taught right from wrong . I would be told to do something then be punished for the actions I was told to do and my logic of was was right and from wrong as it was more trial by error and swim or drown logics .
I was basically told to do bad things and when I got caught I was to drown alone. My mother always acted like an older sister. Instead of a protective mother. She give me the alarm code and no one else was allowed to have the code as my sisters beat the crap out of me for the code and she knew I wouldn't break and give up the code no matter what. She knew I would take a beating as long as she knew they would never get it out of me. She basically locked me in a house of perpetually angry teenagers knowing they wanted to leave the house and tell them I had the code.
If they got mad and walked out of the house as the alarm went off. When the alarm dispatch called she gave me the code and told me not to let my older sisters to leave but never gave me the code to disarm the alarm to not have the police not sent out to the house. My mom would come home my sisters in hand cuffs as the alarm blaring on the home as she left us alone many nights like this. And my sisters wild and defiant often would be arrested and held in the car for escaping the house trying to leave when she set the alarm and left for the night.
You could say my house was a mad house all the way down to the endless boys coming in and out of the house to visit my overly permiscuis sister Paula who was boy crazy and thought she was cute. This was my life the first few months I came home as we were building a reputation of being the party house or the bad girls house at the top of the hill . Everyone knew us in the neighborhood as we were the bad girls that did what they wanted.
Paula was sneaking out in the middle of the night seeing boys and getting high and mia was walking out the door hopping in cars with boys as my mom told us if we missed curfew we went home with whom we came with. This or sleep on the porch until morning because she wasn't opening the door if you were late. It narrowed down that my mother wasn't concerned what we did as long as it didn't ruin her sleep in the end.
We were a tragic mess with no one to care for us and it showed. Eventually mia and paula would run away from home from time to time and my mother would just say they would come home when they felt like it. The only time my mother was home was when she was single and it would last a few weeks and we would be right back to fighting for survival .
I was trapped in a loop of wrong and full of seeing no accountability as I watched the mayhem and chaos of my life knowing that this was my life . This was my family. This was my raising.
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